Toddler Steps

I think? I'm ready for a new boyfriend. Think.

Yes it still hurts that I "lost" to a glorified garage band. It's not the same holy-crap-my-life-is-ending feeling, it's a disappointing taste that lingers for way longer then it should. Kind of like chi tea; it smells heavenly, but the taste is so... nothing. Like you're licking a dry cinnamon stick (not that I know what that's like or anything) A let down. That's what he is, a let down. Like Chi tea. Fail.

But I'm ready for someone else to make me feel good about myself. I know I should do that on my own and not rely on another person, but I will always need the guy telling me I'm beautiful (even if I'm having a fat day. You. Will. Lie). Having a boyfriend does that for me. I just want someone to snuggle up to. And the dog does curl up next to me (soooo cute), but it's not the same as having someone's arms around you.

So I think I'm ready to wade in the dating pool, some harmless (or not) flirting, a crush here and there, just enough to remind me I'm not dead. I know I shouldn't rush into anything, but I just want to know that he's out there. And where is he? He's not in any of my classes this semester, because I am older then everyone. Seriously, even if a kid's a senior, he's 22, maybe 23. And I am just not ready to be a cougar. Yet*.

*Unless it's Clayton. he should move back to Kentucky so I can stare at him. Of course if I ever did snag all 6'3" fighter pilot parts of him I could never ever ever look his sister in the eye again. Ever.