Monday, June 22, 2009

Oddly Flattered

A week ago library guy met some of my friends. He received an initial pass (pass/fail) grade from the all-mighty-Priya, but she wants to give him a letter grade soon. I was a little nervous though, not going to lie. But any guy worth his salt needs to be able to fit in with my friends if he's going to be sticking around. He wasn't shy about putting his arm around me nuzzled my neck while we all watched a Disney movie (which I though might scare him off). Hey, it's what we do, we're dorks and proud of it. That's beside the point. I like him a lot and I'm slightly unnerved how attracted he is to me (I'm weird).

Anyway, he meets my friends, and they don't scare him enough to quell his desire to sleep with me. We enjoy some one on one time that night like two people who are attracted to each other do. But shortly after, (when it's way past my bedtime), he asks me to not spend the night.

I'm thinking, umm, I guess it was too soon to meet my friends. He goes on to explain why, he's got a lot of stuff to do the next day, stuff he needs to concentrate on. He needs to rest in order to do so, and apparently I'm impossible to not have sex with. Which, I beg to differ, there are plenty of guys out there who do not want to have sex with me and find it possible to not jump me either. But to him I'm a (curvy) distraction simply by being there, and he wouldn't get any of rest he needs .

And what am I supposed to say? No I need cuddle time so I don't feel like yesterday's tissue? I'm sorry (?) you can't resist me? What? I'm trying to be super confident put together woman, and clingy need cuddle time woman who just wants a guy to like her is definitely not that. What else could I have said other than (um) "sure that's fine" to save face?

The past few times times we've hooked up, it's been a seal the deal and go (to be fair, I went to the last one with no pretences, I was the one taking him to the airport. I even offered to come over early to hook up). I'm flattered (and slightly freaked out) he finds me attractive. I respect that he's working and knows what he needs (or doesn't) to be productive. And he was able to do the things he needed w/out distraction the next day, so mission accomplished. He walked me to my car and said he had a nice time meeting my friends I guess to placate me. But as I drove away that night, I couldn't help but feel used.

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