Friday, October 30, 2009

Biology is GROSS

It happened. The lab I was dreading since this semester started. Ladies and gentleman, I had to dissect a fetal pig. When I saw the atlas and guide to the fetal pig's anatomy in my required textbook list, I was just hoping it was a joke. A sick joke, but a joke. And when the professor said we had to buy a dissection kit, I knew I would never see bacon the same way.

Yesterday was the day. And I was absolutely freaking the f*ck out. I whimpered as I walked into lab. The place smelled like cleaner and formaldehyde. Then bio-lab stockroom guy brings in the bin with all the piggies in their formaldehyde sealed bags. Two to a pack, how exciting! My stomach flipped (I thought it incredibly prudent to skip my between lecture and lab snack that day).

It was two people per pig, so at least I had a person with me. My poor lab partner had to deal with me squealing and borderline hyperventilating. But it was a team effort, and I eventually sucked it up once I got over touching the thing in the first place. I tried to console myself, rationalizing, I cook, I handle raw meat, I can do this. Umm, except that nothing I've ever cooked still had it's organs. And hair. Ok, why does a pig have hair? No seriously, don't tell me, I don't actually want to know.

But I calmed down enough, took a deep breath, gagged, tied the little guy (we had a boy pig) to the tray and cut. I even got to play with a scalpel. But there were moments I didn't do to good. I'll spare you the details of what set me off, because it's gross, but mainly because I don't want to remember it myself.

We played the what organ is this game (I think we cut off the gall bladder. Meh, like it has any use for it now) and get to clean up, but apparently we're not done poking/learning from the thing. The little oinker is in a bag with my name on it (no, seriously, we wrote our names on it), being kept for another week or 2. I have to do this again. OH. MY. GOD.

And just to add insult to injury, the dissection was only the first hour of the lab. We had to do a completely different lab the remaining 2 hours, one that did not involve cracking Piglet's ribs (too far?). In the midst of a place that smells of formaldehyde.

But hey, I didn't throw up like I had feared. And I didn't faint either, so thumbs up! And while I already knew this about myself, the lab made me 100%, completly, no if and or buts, sure, that I cannot be a doctor.

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