Dogs vs Kids

Disclaimer: I know that having a dog is not in any way shape or form "practice" for having a child. However, I have noticed a few similarities and differences in dog owning and babysitting since having 2 dogs.

Why dogs are NOT like children:

1. You can put dogs in a crate and leave them alone for a few hours. Babies not so much.
2. Dogs you encourage to go potty outside. Babies you encourage to crap in their pants.
3. Dogs are covered in hair. Babies are often bald.
4. If you constantly dress your dog you are weird. If you don't dress your kid you are bad mommy.
5. Dogs like tummy rubs. Well, I have no idea if this one is true, I've never tried to rub a baby's tummy.
6. Puppies you have to wait 2 months-ish before you can take them from their mom. Babies you have to wait 18 years.

Why dogs are like children:

1. You can leash them. In fact, I encourage leash children (dr soc and I disagree on this. I'm all for the leash, and him not so much. I say, lets just see how how much of an escape artist Sharktopus is before we make the leash call.
2. They need constant supervision, at least my dogs do otherwise they start mayhemming about (another reason I am pro-leash).
3. You are completely responsible for the feeding, watering and shelter of them.
4. They make liars out of you.
5. If they are quite you wonder if they are up to something.
6. You love them.
7. You have to worry about them getting into things.
8. They both have special doctors: vets and pediatricians.
9. You say: "get that out of your mouth!" on a constant basis.