Tuesday, December 6, 2011

Grey or Gray? Either Way, It's Not My Favorite Color

Apparently being too terrified to get the mail and doing nothing but worrying about getting into grad school was too much for Mike to handle.  So he made me call the grad school for my admission status this morning since classes start in a month.

I was right to be worried.

Someone in the grad school office looked up my name and the reason the decision was taking so long.  And then I talked to her supervisor to explain things. I was told that a decision has been made, but there are still some questions about my gpa.  So my application has been forwarded to the department head's attention.  Who is in Dallas the rest of this week and not looking at my application. So as of this moment, my admission status is still in a "gray area."

That? Is not a yes. It's not a no either, but... it's not a yes.

This has to be based on my uc gpa. Because my uk cumulative gpa was a 2.9.  I have nothing to show for my 6 years at uc except a low gpa.  And there is nothing I can do to change that.  So now I'm just wishing and hoping and praying that cincinnati hasn't kept me from something I want once again.  Last year when I walked at my graduation, I believed I had finally triumphed over that school.  I had nothing to be embarrassed about anymore. I could hold my head high and say I earned this, and cinci couldn't take anything away from me anymore.  I should have known better.

Needless to say, I'm even more anxious now.  I've said that I would apply again and look into other programs if it didn't happen this year.  But if my gpa is the reason for their hesitancy, there's nothing I can do to change that and this is just going to keep coming up, no matter what school I apply to.  I'm still at the mercy of other people's acceptance.  

Gray sucks.

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