The way I found my dog trainer is that I work with her mom. So on occasion Jamie will call the desk looking for her mom and we'll chat for a few minutes about the dogs. And right now, there's nothing to report. They are getting along fine. They don't play together, but since Mike tenses up and expects the worst to happen if they get close to each other they don't get the chance to play even if they wanted. But right now, they're just there, co-existing in the same house. They're not challenging each other, resource guarding or jockeying for the dominate position. They're just, there. They're just being. They go to "place," they walk on their pinch collars. They "sit" and "down" on command, and if they don't on command they get a pop with the pinch collar until they do. Usually reaching for the leash to pop is enough to get a compliance, but Jules still occasionally throws a fit if you correct her. Stubborn little ass that she can be though, she's no match for my bitter determination. The other day I even took them both for a short walk by myself. And nothing happened. There's really nothing to report.
And I almost hate that because it makes giving up my best friend Bailey seem that much more ridiculous and this heartache that much more unnecessary. But what does that matter? It doesn't lessen my grief in any way, turns out it exacerbates it. The one thing I want most of all there's no hope for. Which is why I'm so defeated and don't have the strength to fight for her anymore. It's the giving up on a nothing to report perfectly normal nothing extraordinary (but extraordinary to me) dog that hurts most of all.
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