Queen Bee

"You were popular in high school weren't you?" This is a question I get on occasion. Well, sorta. I was popular within my group of friends. But in the grand scheme of popularity hierarchy in high school, I was definitely not what you would consider "classically popular."

But like I said two seconds ago, I think I was (am) popular w/in my group of friends. We didn't really have a designated queen bee in it, but there's a core group of people that come to mind when you think of a certain group of people, and that's where I think I'm found (hey if I'm wrong, please don't tell me. Let me be deluded on this 'kay?)

It's better without a queen bee really. Mean girls are an ugly and vicious side of reality. And I think life's better when you don't have to be wary of someone stabbing you in the back for your top social spot.

But, not to say I didn't want to be queen bee in other groups. Or felt that I should be because I clearly knew what was going on and it would be so much easier of everyone listened to me. Like my ex's friends. He was the backbone/default leader of the band**

**by backbone I mean he was the one always "lighting a fire under a guys ass" for not taking it as serious as the rest of them. And if you weren't giving it 150% like he was then you didn't want it as bad as him and bla bla bla. Stuff that made the other guys gravitate and look up to him as the guy who gets things done (band wise, heaven forbid he get anything else done in life). But now that I think about it, was he truly the backbone or just the most foolish of them all?

So by default, I should have been queen bee of the girlfriends (and eventually I should have reigned over the groupies as well). After all, you can't be any sort of power couple if you aren't both in power. Duh.

Not that they knew that. Or knew what a queen bee was either. And what would my rank wielded me anyway? There were no perks. Backstage passes? (umm, first, what backstage?), Dictating their social lives that I didn't want to be a part of anyway? They actually wanted to be rock star wives, just as much as our guys wanted to actually be rock stars. And rock star wife seems glamorous, but really, it's just a grimy lonely sad place to be. And to be queen of the others would have been a tasteless glaze on that cake (not yummy icing) and a dollar store tiara.

And they were a nice enough bunch and polite when it counted, I was never going to be bff's with any of them. And it's just no fun to be queen bee of people who don't adore but fear you just a little more (it's a delicate balance really).