Is it wrong that whenever I'm single I start crushing on a friend? (hey, does anyone else think it's cute for a grown woman to have a crush? Or is it just creepy?) I've crushed on nearly every guy friend I've had since high school. It rarely develops into a full blow can't stop thinking about him sort of thing, but there's always that hmm, what if... moment I feel. (For a while though in my early 20's I was starting to run out of guy friends (is it ok to recycle crushes?)). However I value my friendships, and I don't want to loose anyone I care about, so I try to not act on my pounce inklings. I know it's a case of single pool apprehension. And if I have a crush on someone, then I don't feel as unsteady I guess. (Though I was never completely out of the single pool w/library guy. We both still had our feet in)
Given my current status, the logical conclusion is: crush on a friend. So I am. And I wonder do I like this guy because I genuinely like him, or because I just want to crush one someone and he's safe? I'm very comfortable around him. He's seen me at some low (fuzzy/slurry) points in my life, and he's also seen me w/out makeup. So I trust him. I'm a little jealous if he talks about other girls, and sometimes I wonder if he talks about me to anyone. And not going to lie, I've been attracted to him from day one.
In theory, it would be great to be with this guy. But the aforementioned just like to like someone makes me think I've simply pushed him into my default crush spot. And even if he was having the same crush-type notions about me, I know for him it's not nearly as complex as I've made it out to be. With guys, it's they like you or they don't (why can't I be that simple?). And fortunately, I'm solidly in the friend zone with this guy and he won't cross that line. (yay and boo at the same time)
2 comments:
You're half right: with guys it is simple (they like you or they don't), but not quite so simple because they're waiting to see if you're going to cut them off and force them in the platonic lane. Then, of course, there are the guys who don't wait...you get the point.
hmm,
I dunno if that works as a blanket statement. For me, likes and crushes are always very complicated...
...then again, i think i'm a pretty atypical male in a lot of regards...
I can definitely see where you're coming from on the whole crushing on friends thing... though I don't tend to do it myself.
Also, unlike what bry said, i don't think its always girls that force the platonic friendship. My default is platonic - i like a girl very rarely but when i do its huge (though it takes me for freakin ever to actually fall in love)...
hmmm... enough about me.
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