Happy Halloween!

There's a scene from the movie Mean Girls about Halloween costumes. The doors of the hot high school girls open up and they are all wearing animal print lingerie and matching animal ears. One of the girls ask another: "What are you supposed to be?" (she's wearing a gray teddy) and the other girl: "I'm a mouse, duh" (points to headband of mouse ears)
Somewhere in there Li-lo poignantly says (poignant because someone else wrote it for her): "Halloween is the one night a year when girls can dress like a total slut and no other girls can say anything about it."

And it's so true. I went into the temporary Halloween store yesterday to look for cheap decorations. And for giggles, I looked at the "ladies" costumes. I was expecting slutty costumes, after all, my fail-safe costume used to be catholic school girl (but I still assembled/made my costume, even the rosary. I didn't buy anything for it and think I was original either). But Oh. My. GOD. Every single costume is so whorey. So, so. so whorey. And you know what? If you do not look hot in slutty clothes normally, why do you think you're going to look hot in a slutty Halloween costume? Are you that big of an idiot? It's a costume, not a miracle worker. But yes, I guess they really are that stupid. Because the kind of ass-hat who buys a costume is going to be the same ass-hat who thinks they're hot sh*t in a vinyl corset. Ladies have some self respect. I don't want to see your cellulite-ed ass hanging out of a short skirt any day of the year, Halloween is no exception.
Besides, a lot of the fun in costumes is coming up with and making it. Anyone can go out and buy a sexy devil costume and some grease paint. And there's nothing stopping you from making your costume slutty if you want to make it yourself.

So happy Halloween everyone! I'll be in prude in the poodle skirt and fake pearls. Because even though I might not be allowed to say anything about your slutty outfit this particular evening, there's nothing in the rule book that says I can't judge. And you know I am.