Marathon Dreams

Around Christmas time, I told my sister that I might, maybe in a few years, want to do a full marathon. After I'm done with school and have run a few more halves. I like the halves, it still requires training and I like a race that finishing alone is an accomplishment. But ya know, I was getting the itch that maybe I would want to do the full just to do it.

As I was taping my shins last week (my taper week) I made myself a goal. I thought to myself: my goal is 2:20 this time (hoping for 2:15 in all honestly). I can probably consistently take off time, and break the 2 hour mark. Then, that's when I'll do a full. When I run 13.1 miles in under 2 hours, my next big race will be a marathon.

I figured I had time, 2-4 years. Take off 5-8 minutes, maybe even 10 each running season. And then I rocked this last half. At 2:05:03.

Wow. That marathon just got a hell of a lot closer!

And the results...

So the half this morning...

There was rain. Sideways rain, sideways because there was wind. And rain + wind = cold. I had to pee the last half of the race. I couldn't feel my fingers the entire race. My feet were wet, and by mile 4 I couldn't tell if the water on my skin was sweat or rain (it was not sweat fyi). The course wasn't spectator friendly, so there was very little cheering and that was a bummer. I did see my family twice and that was nice. By the time I crossed the finish line, (woot!) all I wanted was a bathroom, a banana and a hot shower. I didn't have any idea of my time, and I didn't really care to find out at the moment.

Honestly, I wasn't too happy with the whole experience right after.

But I got home and took my shower looked up my time. My goal was 2:20.
my results...

2:05:03

Oh. My. GOD! Two hours. Five minutes. Three seconds. Mother fcker, that's awesome! I rocked it!
And suddenly, I was very very happy.

And now, I nap. Or get a pedicure. Whatever. Go me!

Ready, Set, GO!

Ok it's here! Tomorrow morning at 8 am my 3rd half marathon starts! I've been training at a 10 minute mile, which should put my time at 131 minutes, or 2:11.

However, that's a huge chuck of time to take off (my best time is 2:26:06), and I also didn't train for hills, and I'm a nervous on how my legs will hold up. So the goal is 2:20, taking 6 minutes off my best time. I can do that. Right? We'll see, finger's crossed!

I'll post tomorrow how I did. Right now, I'm just trying to relax and think about running my best.

Here we go!

PS: My sister came into town to watch me run! It was such a nice surprise!

Boy Talk

A tweet from me the other day:
"glad we've been spending time together :)" <--someone decode boy speak for me.

The response from a friend:
@spazzella translation: "I want to spend more time with you, but am avoiding creepdom by omitting saying your clothes don't need to attend"

Ohhhhhhhh. Snort. Gotcha, thanks!

Nicknames

For my own pretend privacy sake, I don't use my last name on my blog. Because if I really did want to remain completely anonymous behind the safety of a computer screen, I wouldn't have a blog, facebook 4.5 emails and twitter. But hey, like I said, pretend.

I also rarely use my friends names, just initials to respect their own boundaries (or because there's a lot of us and it's just faster to list us by initials). Or I bestow blog names,like "dr friend", "default crush" or "library guy." Nicknames that you can probably guess who they are or how I know them, but it's still not an actual "here's who I'm talking about." It's a way of gossiping divulging sharing about my life but still keep a few things (sorta) close to the vest.

But one of my favorite nicknames for myself involves my last name so I don't use it here. Which is a shame becasue I like it. Oh well, I'm still pretending to be a grown up, I can pretend to be a private person too.

Happy Birthday!

Happy Birthday Amy!

It sort of blows my mind that my little sister is 25. Seriously, 25. That's, like, an adult age or something.

Yeah I'm 27 and I've come to terms with that and I know my sister is 2 and a half years younger than me so logically that makes her 25. But still, my mind can't grasp it.

Whatever. Happy Birthday!

Dear Mother Nature

Please bring back the warmer temperatures now that it's spring. It significantly reduces my stabby tendencies.

Best!
Sarah

Click

You know when things just click with someone? Yeah, I think I've got that. We've had our 5th date (not that I'm keeping track of stuff like that...), he's been bestowed a blog name, and I've met a few of his coworkers. All good signs.

An even better sign: Bailey likes him. She's protective of me and the house whenever someone comes to the door. Especially any guys, repair men, our neighbors, my friends, ect, with males she goes on insta-alert. Which I warned dr soc about because no one likes to be attacked by 50 lbs of spaz. So he brought a toy the first time he met her, in attempts to win her (and probably me somewhat) over. And it worked, she warmed up to him in an instant.

We have similar family back grounds, our educations are in the same field, our dogs are a lot alike and oh. my. god. the chemistry is there. (I may have gotten a mercy D in last semester's chem class, but I didn't need a tutor for this type of chemistry) There are are a lot of good signs. And I'm choosing to be an optimist and not wondering: what could go wrong, but instead think: why shouldn't it work? After a particularly breathtaking encounter, (seriously, top 5 of my life), after my heart rate returns to somewhat normal, I blurt out " I'd say we're compatible." He chuckled and said he was thinking the same thing.

Yeah. Click.

The Sanctity of Marriage

Does anyone believe in the sanctity of marriage anymore? Seriously, people left and right are cheating on each other, physically and emotionally, and it disgusts me.

Ok first, I'm (mostly) referring to Hollywood and the realm of public personalities. Every day there's a story/release of the dirty sext sent (Tiger), mistress/artist (snort) defends her position (Jessie James), love child and the campaign affair details (Edwards) (umm, love child? since when is an affair love?), or a declaration of your soul mate after 20 years of marriage (SC governor).

The mistress/boy toy can claim they didn't know person was married, but we all know that's bull shit. The paparazzi follows down to C-list stars, there is no such thing as a secret. Everyone's guilty in this, and the only thing the media does is pour kerosene on the fire, encourages book deals left and right and creates an even bigger media storm. I get scandals sell and are riveting, but why is there even a scandal in the first place?

The whole situation is wrong and unfair to everyone, not just those directly involved in the affair. What about the people left in the wake of destruction? The wronged spouse, the children placed on opposing battle sides, the extended family, business partners and mutual friends? What about them? Who picks up their pieces? And then the guilty party makes a heartfelt apology to all those they wronged, but they can shut it. You knew what you were doing, you wanted to know what you cold get away with. You knew you were/are still married, you said those vows at some point in time.

I know there are good people out there, who don't stray. And there are great marriages that stay true to their vows because they mean them. But they don't get publicity. Instead, we hear dirty details and the stuff that makes our tongues wag. All the while, wanting to vomit at the same time.

Shin Spints

I'm pretty sure I have shin splints. Shit.

For them to heal, you are supposed to rest them and ease back into your workout. Umm no, s'aint happening. My first half is in a week and a half, the 2nd is 4 weeks after that. I still have to run and keep in shape.

It's not just the running either, how do you rest you rest your legs? I still need to walk the dog, I'm on my feet at my job, and I walk a lot on campus too. I elevate my legs when I can, I ice them for an hour after work, but still, I don't think that's going to help them heal, just stop me from exasperating the injury more. There's always the tape option, which I'll probably start using as well. And that's a sexy look. My thick man legs with tape wrapped from my ankles to knees. Great.

Lesser of the evils I guess.

Still. Boo.

Rules

Conversation between 2 friends
Friend 1: Oh, the dating world......people ONLY go out on weekday dates here. Weekend dates are only for couples. NEVER for first dates. Too many rules. I hate dating.
Friend 2: Dating does have too many rules!

I had my 1st and 2nd date w/dr soc on weeknights, which is what spurred the above conversation. When I told my girlfriends about the 1st date (of course I did. I was excited, there was an emoticon involved), friend 2 had a problem with it being a weeknight date. Aren't I weekend worthy? (of course yes, but well, it's a first date)

But friend 2 is married and well, not hip to the dating rules. So friend 1 had to explain some of the single world to her. But there's one thing we all agreed on: dating does have way too many rules. And honestly, none of us, single or married, really understand them either.

I certainly don't. Proper time frames, what to wear, if and when to put out, what you can and cannot ask/say/do depending on what number/type of date you are on... The list is extensive, exhaustive and just plain ruley. Being a compulsive rule follower that I am, of course I obey. I may not understand all of them, but I still play by them anyway.

Loot and Pillage

Remember how I dropped my wallet a few weeks ago but someone picked it up and handed it back to me? And I was relived I didn't loose my monetary life? And I considered it good karma for everyone involved? Yeah, that's kinda moot now.

My wallet was stolen yesterday. Not misplaced, or dropped or lost. STOLEN.

I went for my long run yesterday (10 miles, 101:28 minutes) and I was feeling pretty good after it. My weekend was going well, I just started spring break, I got to spend time with my sister, I got a pretty new dress and I had a great date with dr soc. I had a good run (I was tired don't get me wrong, but still, good run), and I had just watched UK squeak by with the SEC championship. Good mood.

So when I get to the locker room to put on dry clothes and go home, I see right way that I had forgotten to close the lock on my locker. I searched my gym bag to make sure everything was still there. Obviously not. My bag wasn't that full, and my wallet is, err, was, bright teal, so it's easy to spot. The thief who I know was a girl because it was stolen from the women's locker room, left my cell and car keys, and there was no cash in there. I had my ipod on me at the time, but still. MY WALLET WAS STOLEN.

I searched the bathroom stalls and I told the front desk. I knew they couldn't really do anything about it though since it was my own carelessness. I canceled my credit cards and suspended my plus account (uk money) w/in 2 hours of it happening, and I can get a new licence today. I lost my bus pass but I can get a new/different type of pass and work will reimburse me, so I'm not out that much money. Basically, the only thing this girl got from me is my bus pass that's valid for another 2 1/2 months and a fake id if she looks like me.

I'm mostly pissed about it being essentially my own fault. The steeling part sucks and it's still steeling which is illegal, but I was the one who forgot to lock my locker. I presented the opportunity. And I so rarely do shit like that. I feel violated, a complete stranger went through my stuff. But I acted quickly and I can replace everything. It's mostly a huge inconvenience on my part.

Lesson learned I guess. Still sucks though.

Personal Space

What's with the lack of respect for personal space?

I was waiting in line at the pharmacy and I was standing way behind this one girl because she was coughing every 10 seconds and looked like hell hung out to dry. Whatever she had, I didn't want. So I kept my distance and respected her personal space.

The girl behind me, not so much.

Way not so much. She's all up in my bubble. And I have a huge backpack and my gym bag slung over one shoulder, so my personal area is already crowded.

Of all places, you think people would try to get as much space between each other when you are in line for meds. medicine = reason for it = germs= contagious = respect the personal area.

God I hate college kids sometimes.

Guide dog

So I'm sitting on the hall floor outside my class about an hour before it starts. I've got my head buried in social theory and when out of no where, there's a dogs face in my face and it's giving me kisses. Since I have a (naughty) dog, I'm ok with this. Surprised, but ok.

But I'm in Whitehall where I know the only animals allowed are service animals, so clearly that's what this is. It has the harness on and everything. And one of the attributes of service animals is how steady and patient they are. (this is how I know Bailey could not be a therapy dog.) Not easily distracted while guiding/therapy-ing.

But this dog is all into me, wagging it's tail, and clearly not being a service dog at the moment. I realize it's after my lunch where there's a pb&j. I know peanut butter is crack to dogs (Bailey runs into the kitchen when I take the jar down), but man, I had no idea how potent that lure is. Meanwhile, the handler had to tug on it's leash to get it to pay attention to him and then bumped into a trash can.

Worst guide dog ever?

I think yes.

Runners Legs

Remember how I said I was going to try to not focus on my weight and instead work on my overall fitness? I did that. I stopped getting on the scale every day (now it's once a week) I run all my miles and I incorporated a set of plyometrics in my training to make me a better runner.

I really like the plyos. I don't know why, I just find them fun. And I'm super proud of myself that I can jump the top (30") box now (except that one day. I missed. It hurt. I cried in public. Then jumped it again just to prove to myself (everyone) missing was a fluke). What they do is they work your fast twitch muscles which are good for short powerful motions; ie taking off from starting blocks. But as fast twitch muscles develop, they build. My slow twitch muscles (which are for endurance) are strengthening as well, but they don't bulk like fast twitches do.

While I don't step on the scale every day, I'm not blind and I can still see myself in the mirror. So during a particularly scrutinizing self overlook, when I realized my legs are NOT slim lean runners legs, I did what any woman with body issues does. I ran to my mom. And she confirmed my fears, I have THICK (albeit powerful looking) legs.

Yeah. By doing the sets of plyometrics this season, I'm given myself thick chunky legs. I could look like scary Madonna soon (the pop icon, not the saint), and clearly, that won't do. So now I'm torn because I really like the jumping, but I don't like how they make me look. They're fun, a good workout and impressive that I can do them (30" is 'effing impressive!). But I have man legs!

So, shit. Now what?

Hockey Girl

When I worked retail in cinci I had a boss who went to UK. Of course, as soon as another Kentuckian discovers you chose to not go to the flagship school having lived there all your life you get asked "why didn't you go to UK?" a lot. But this boss and I had a good repertoire and occasionally exchanged Kentucky jokes.

Like most places on earth, there are things that only make sense in the area and don't transcend unless you're with another local. You pretty much have to be from Kentucky to understand the entity that is UK and all the other stuff that goes with it. Like the hockey poster. Trust me, everyone at UK knows what the hockey poster is. Hell, it's how we know we have a team, let alone a sport other than men's basketball (we have women's sports too, did you know that?).

But back to the retail job. One day I tried to toss a hanger in the proper bin and completely missed. It bounced off the outside of the bin, that's how bad I missed.

My boss snarks out: "now I see why you didn't go to UK!"

I laugh good naturally as I pick up the hanger and say: "No, but I could have been on the hockey calender!"

Boss: "nice!"

The one that started it all. Arguably the most famous too.

Jinx

I really don't want to jinx this...

But I really like the guy I just started seeing. He's smart and nice and fun and easy to be around, tall dark and handsome, confident without being cocky, and every time I get an email from him I can't wait to read it. He makes me laugh and smile and comfortable at the same time.

We started "talking" middle February, so it hasn't been that long. It hasn't even been 2 weeks since meeting in person (I just did the math) and we've already had our third date. So it's still really really early. And I really like him. I may have a few different dates too, with different guys who are just as charming and fun. It's giving me a confidence boost to say the least.

But... I don't really want to meet these guys anymore. I would rather spend my time with this guy (I'll reveal his blog name at a later date out of respect/fear of the jinxing) and have things go as smoothly as they are.

I'm ready. I'm ready to date with the possibility of it going somewhere. I'm ready to fall in love again and spend my time with someone. I'm ready to look at the future not as a lack of my could have beens, but as possibilities. I'm ready for a serious relationship, sooner rather than later. It might not be this guy, because well, it just might not be. But then again, it could be. But the fact that I'm ready makes me smile. And that it could be with this guy, makes me smile more.

School Night

So for our 2nd date, I suggested trivia because it's super fun and I would get fed at the same time. Win win situation, and we won best team name thanks to my creative (over opinionated) self, so, rock. We laugh and talk and hold hands across the table (when not writing answers obviously) and we know the chemistry is there. It was a fun night all around. But the night comes to a close and we must leave. We're about to head in different directions towards our cars but before we part we kiss goodnight. I had a bit to drink that night (I could still drive home), so I was way into the kiss goodnight. Hands-through-hair-lip-locked-leave-you-breathless-kind-of-kiss into it. And he like any red blooded male, responded just as enthusiastically.

It's only the second date and we don't even know each others' last names by this point, so we both knew we were not going to go home with each other that night (well, to his place, seeing as going to my place would be all sorts of icky). But it's not like the thought isn't crossing both our minds. So as we break apart one of us has to say something and
he says: too bad it's late...
and my response: yeah...and it's a school night.

Yep. I did. That just all sorts of dorky.
(hey, but he asked me out again, so woo hoo!)

Do-Over

A friend and I were chatting and he was talking about what he would say to himself if he ever met the younger version of himself. So of course I started thinking about it too. If given the chance to redo it, what would you do differently?

As I thought about it, I realized I honestly don't know what I would tell little me (once I got over the initial mind-fck of seeing my childhood self that is). Yeah, there are little things, like I wouldn't have worn that outfit, or stuff that I wish I had said, or don't ever cut your hair into a boy cut. But as much as I have wished somethings had happened differently, as far as the big things go, the outcomes have been good in some way.

What would I have done differently? First, I wouldn't have picked UC, maybe not even design. I would have gone to UK and done I don't know what. But I went to UC for the interior design program and I made some of my bestest friends ever through it. So clearly, never making those friendships isn't a good thing at all.

Second, I don't think I would have dated my ex. Or at least I would have broken up with him when I thought about it early in the relationship. But then, if we hadn't gotten engaged, we wouldn't have adopted Bailey. And we all know how much I love that dog. And honestly, if we hadn't adopted her, she might not have made it. Who knows if another family would have saved her?

So the two biggest things I would do over have given me some great outcomes. So if by some magic, if given the chance, I wouldn't change it.

Well, there is one piece of advice I'd give little me. I would tell me: when the most beautiful guy you've ever seen in Nashville gives you his number, CALL HIM. If there was one time to ignore your scruples and conveniently forget you had a boyfriend at the time, that was it.

Pallet

There are certain "human foods" you can and cannot give your dog. When Bailey was back after the parvo, the vet gave us the ok to give her broiled chicken breast and rice. Basically, we just wanted to get her eating and something that would be easy on her system too.

Post-parvo, pre-knee-gate, Bailey ate a bunch of grapes I left on the counter. I caught her red pawed in the kitchen with the stem still sticking out of her mouth. She looked incredibly guilty too which made the moment even more hysterical. But something inside me said "call the vet," and I'm really glad I did because grapes are horrible for dogs. It won't cause instant death, but something in grapes/raisins build up in their systems and eventually renal (kidney) failure sets in. The vet asked
vet: how many did she have?
me: a whole bunch.
vet: are we talking 3 or 4? Or more like 15+?
me: no really, the whole bunch.
vet: oh. Yeah, that's bad. How long ago did she eat these?
me: no more than 15 minutes ago.
vet: ok, we have time. Can you bring her in right now?
me: I'm on my way, I'll be there in 15.

An hour and half, $90 and one miserable looking puppy later, everything was fine. But after having this scare, I went on a frantic interweb search for other harmful/dangerous/no-no human foods. I discovered that mushrooms and onions were also on the forbidden food list for Bailey.

Now as we also know, my ex was a notoriously picky eater, and his list of no-no foods was longer than a 5 year olds. Nothing would actually kill him like Bailey's no-no foods would kill her. He just was coddled as a kid and I for some unknown reason put up with that bullsh*t. Anyway he loathed mushrooms and onions, so when I told him they were bad for Bailey, he responded along the lines of:

x: See, I knew Bailey and I were alike, bad for her, no good for me either.
me: um, did you just compare your pallet to our dog's? She eats her own poop!

Pay it Forward

I believe in karma.
Want proof?

I smile at the bus driver when I get on, and I make sure to say thank you when I get off. You just never know how far that will go. The other day, as I was getting off the bus, I dropped my wallet and didn't notice. It has my ids, credit cards, bus pass, pretty much my life in it. Another passenger saw me drop it, picked it up and ran after me. I had my ipod turned up a bit too loud and didn't hear the passenger calling out to me. So the bus driver honks his horn to get my attention, and then waits until the other passenger hands me my wallet.

I was absolutely relieved and of course I said thank you to both of them. I know how incredibly lucky it was that it went that way and my life wasn't stolen due to my own carelessness. It was a good situation for everyone. Me for getting my wallet back. The other passenger for running after me, and the bus driver for waiting. It was good karma for everyone involved.