When I Grow Up

(snort)

Anyway, the one thing I've always wanted to be was a wife and mom. I want the whole package, the husband, 2.5 kids, the dog and the white picket fence. I'm totally the married and babies girl. And what's wrong with that? Seriously? Why is it when you say, I want to be a wife and mom, you get this look of is that all? Um, you know what, it's a f*cking hard job, it never ends, you don't get coffee breaks, and everything is somehow your fault. And yet, if you say: I don't want children, or even: I'm not sure if I do, you get looks of horror because that goes against human nature. Because as a woman, having children should be your one and only dream (yet when it is you get chastised).

So clearly, I must do it all. I'm going to have to have a career (not a job. and YES, there is a difference) so bring on pharmacy (which incidentally is a great career for woman because of it's flexibility). So I started thinking about what I wanted to be when I was a kid. Architect, doctor, fashion designer, teacher, movie star... I figured, that if there was a Barbie for it, I wanted to be it at some point. And then I had the bestest idea ever. I should just be Barbie! Think about it, she has a dream home and a pink corvette! And a boy toy. Who doesn't want that?

I mean, I'm not 7 feet tall, I have all my ribs and internal organs and my rack isn't 42," nor do I have any hope to be a blond...but whatever.