Reasons

The morning after the wedding dr soc and I made our marriage facebook official by changing our relationship status and I changed my last name.  'Cause you know, the vows, the judge, 120 witnesses and party afterwards was nice and all, but it's not official until you put it on facebook.

Anyway, we both got beaucoup amounts of likes and well wishes, from lots of people, including some people who were not invited or able to come to the wedding.

Except for one comment (tacked onto a plea for rsvps, a month after the fact) which I deleted.  And it was:

I didn't rsvp because I wasn't invited

^^That?^^ Is why you weren't invited.

Ring around the rosy

Some people opt to not wear a wedding band. Mike and I are not those people.
Now since I've been wearing my engagement ring almost non stop since I received it just over a year ago, my wedding band hasn't been too hard for me to get use to. Either wearing it or seeing it on my hand.  Mike however, doesn't wear any jewelry, so his wedding band is something I'm not used to seeing on his hand.
And let me tell you, (and I'll admit that this is the newlywed gushing here) every time I see his ring on his hand, knowing that he's my husband, my heart does it's own little happy dance.

Best Day Ever!

Our wedding day was absolutley perfect!
Maybe one day I'll post more pictures of the day, that is if I ever tag, save, and post them from facebook, of course.
But for now here's a picture of the happiest day of my life and the people who made it possible

pictured: a WHOLE lot of happy!

Thank you everyone!

I do

We're married!!!!!

Ready

The wedding's tomorrow! The wedding's tomorrow!!!!! SQUEEEEEEE!!!!!
After planning this thing for a little over a year (and a half, but shh, don't tell Mike), I can't believe that this day is almost here.  Obviously, I'm excited. And I'm nervous too, but not nervous to get married. Nervous that everything will go right.  But I'm not worried too much, because I know that at the end of the day we're still married. I'm just ready.
I'm ready to be Mike's wife. I'm ready to stand up there in front of our family and friends and say our vows, telling the world with a ring we will spend the rest of our lives together (if he dies on me first I will kill him).
I'm so incredibly lucky. It's a pretty wonderful place to be!

Weather Ballon

My friend LB can control the weather. We'll not the whole wide world's weather, but she can target key areas for certain things.  Like perfect weather for our friend Jeanne's wedding.  Or diverting some storms to other areas of the coast so my sister's groom could make their wedding. (oh yeah, Amy, if you didn't know that already, I totally asked Lb to help out your wedding. You're welcome.)

Knowing my friend had this super power, I planned on calling in her services for my wedding day, whenever that would be.  But like all powers, one must use them with caution.  Fortunately, I don't really need her power in 3 days. According to the forecast, my wedding day has 0% chance of rain, but it will be 93 degrees. But we're getting married indoors anyway, so rain and heat don't worry me too much.

And besides, I already used her power. Twice actually. The first was my sister's wedding I already mentioned.  The other time was for my graduation. Lexington was having freakishly cold days and we had, get this, snow that stuck. Snow that stuck finals week and delayed/rescheduled some peoples' finals.  I was lucky that all my finals escaped the rescheduling, but I had one more final looming, and I was completely terrified that not only would UK would postpone that final, they would cancel the graduation.   

So I begged LB to control the weather long enough so I could take my 8 am final and then walk at 7 pm at the graduation ceremony.  I didn't care what happened the next day, and I don't know if I screwed over someone else weather wise, but if I ever needed her super power, it was then. Graduation was a little more important to me than using her power for a wedding I even close to at the time. LB put her power to work, and the evening before my final, I got an email saying that not only would all finals operate on a regular schedule, graduation was on track.  I was so relived I almost cried. 

Though I'm pretty sure that if I did need her super power this weekend, she could pull a few strings and help out. She's good like that!

I'm sure

last night as we're leaving work
coworker: So, 6 days!
me: NO, 5 days.
coworker: Oh. Are you sure?
me: YES.

Now it's 4 days. And yes, I'm sure about that too.

Monkey See Monkey Do

mike upon seeing the leftover pancakes on the kitchen island
mike: I'm guessing you're done with the pancakes?
me: oh. yeah. I thought I may want another so I left them out, but then I forgot. (I just worked an overnight and I'm running on 4.5 hours of sleep and a big cup of coffee. I'm a little out of it)
mike: I should get you a helper monkey.
--i give him a confused look-- (in fairness, all logic right now seems confusing to me)
me: As a wedding present?
mike: To put things away after you. (he's the clean one between us two) It would follow you around, picking up things. But it might poop in the house. May even rival Jules there.
me: You know you would probably be the one picking up after the monkey, right? A monkey doesn't seem like the best idea anymore.
mike: Yeah. Good point.
me: The conversations we have.

Trendy

About a year ago Mike and I were ring shopping, so I figured why not tell this story now.
.
jeweler: which one do you want to see?
me: Can I try that oval one? With the halo?
me (to mike): I really like the halo....
jeweler: Of course. (like he would tell me no) 
The jewler points out a few other rings similar in style as well as a few different styles.
jeweler: what do you think of this one?
me: It's pretty, but I don't care for the 3 stone rings myself, it seems a bit...dated... for me.
jeweler: That's ok. They were popular about 10-15 years ago but not so much anymore.  You can bet that most women with a 3 stone ring got engaged then. They're somewhat time defining.
me: Yeah, I noticed that trend.  (Here Mike gets a look of holy crap she notices engagment ring trends? There are engagment ring trends?) Out of curiousity, what's popular now?
jeweler: the halo...
me: -snort-  Good thing I like it then!

Middle Name

me: Bailey's middle name is Marie
mike: Bailey has a middle name?
me: It's her in trouble name. It just popped out one day when I was scolding her for something. 'Bailey Marie!' And it stuck.
mike: Sure...
me: Yep. Which reminds me, I gave Jules one too.
mike: Okay.....why?
me: For when she is in trouble. I can call out her full name.
mike: Well, what is it? Her middle name I mean.
me: Elizabeth. 
mike: And how did she get that?
me: The same way Bailey got hers. They were hanging out in the back yard and I looked out there to check on them. And there was Miss Jules, walking on top of the patio table, sniffing the rice I had left out there to dry.*
mike: She was on the table again?
me: Yep. So I opened the door with a "Jules Elizabeth! You get down from there!" And there you have it, her middle/in trouble name was thus.
mike: So, Bailey Marie and Jules Elizabeth.
me: Yes.
mike: Okay.
me: You know, I'm so glad you just roll with this stuff.
mike: You're welcome. It's just easier that way.
me: I bet. 

*don't ask. Wedding related. I'm sure you're not surprised.

Cuts

Some other couple had a speedy wedding at my venue last weekend.  Which means I'm not the first wedding there anymore.  And surpisingly, I'm a little hurt by this.

By being the first wedding, I was a forgiving and knew that there was a learning curve with the venue.  Communication wasn't great at first and Mike wanted to forgo the deposit and find anyother venue he was so fed up. (We didn't since I was wasn't going to start weddin gplanning all over again. And our save the dates were already sent out). 

I didn't know I liked being the first wedding there so much. Now that it won't be mine.  I feel like I did all the legwork and was the learning curve.  Like I was practice, and this couple just swooped in and took a cut in line.

The bright side is that hopefully things will run a little smoother for us since the venue will have a better idea of what to do wedding day.  Not as many first time jitters for them.  And I know my wedding will still be special and wonderful no matter what, because it's my wedding.  No matter if I'm the 1st or 1000th bride there. It's still my wedding. And there's nothing I can do to change this so I'll have to get over it.  But I'm still pouting just a little. 

adults only

To all the couples that do want an adults only reception, know that it's ok to want that.*  It is your day and you can celebrate how you want to. But be forewarned that everyone will have an opinion one way or another and you will probably ruffle some feathers in doing so. It's a common thread on the knot: My cousin/friend/mom's friend's daughter's old college roommate** wants to bring their kid and we're doing an adults only reception. My cousin/friend/mom's friend's daughter's old college roommate is super pissed we're not inviting jr and threatening to not come/is going to bring them anyway no matter what I want. Help!

Right now I side with the bride's side and tell her to stick to her guns. Don't kowtow to those people who become offended you didn't invite their precious children. And I know I don't have kids yet so I can't say how I'll feel about leaving them at home to these events in the future.***

But I have a little tidbit for all the brides who want an adults only reception.  You don't want kids there? Invite them.
That's how it seemed to work for us at least. Mike and I invited about 20 kids (all under the age of 14), and a grand total of 5 of them are coming.  Of course, we didn't intended to have an adults only reception anyway and our invitations were genuine.  It's just most of the guests with kids:
A) Can't make it anyway. And/or
B) Have opted to leave the kids at home for their own adult night.

Which was a choice we were fine with either way.  And I'm not saying what we did was a right or wrong way to do things, it was the best way for us.  I just think it's a little funny.

*Just don't be an asshole about it. Getting married is not a excuse to make ridiculous demands and then pitching a hissy fit because you didn't get every single ridiculous thing you demanded.
**honestly, if you're extending the invite this far out, you may as well invite kids.
***though if I do become one of those moms that thinks her children should be included in everything, do me a favor and please refer me back to this post.

Best Weekend

So, as promised yesterday, a recap of my awesome bachelorette and shower weekend!
Well, like I said, first, they were both awesome.  Not only did I have a great time I was with my bestest friends and family who traveled many many miles to throw these parties for me and share in the fun times with me.

pictured: 5 states gathered for a cinco de mayo lunch
not pictured: why Jeanne and LB should not be left unsupervised

Then, after we celebrated cinco de mayo properly, it was on to the main event: The Kentucky Derby!

The infield. Pre-drunk and disorderly. Though the mint juleps certainly expedited that process 

About an hour or two after we got into the infield I got a little over heated what with being in the direct sun and the only liquids in my system was a combination of tequila and bourbon.  But, lucky for me, I roll with my own personal EMS team, (Priya's a dr. A real one) and I was able to cool down.  Then we bought a program, placed our bets and eventually staked out a spot where we possibly could see the the race.

And we did!  I actually got to see 2, maybe even 3 seconds of the actual derby run by!  It was just a blur of horses and quick streaks of color from the jockey's silks, and the noise of the pounding hooves was almost drowned out by the throngs of screaming people (myself included), but it was so exhilarating!  Of course we had no idea who won and after waiting in the betting line for a while turns out 2 of us in my posse won money.  I didn't win anything, but that's ok because I fully expected that. I can't pick a horse for the life of me and I accept that. 

Of course, getting out of the infields is a long and crowded process, but you just take your time, keep up with the crowd and make your way back to the car without incident.  Though Jeanne has a good point that most people probably block out the exiting or else they wouldn't come back year after year.  The Derby and the infield are definitely an experience and I'm thrilled I got to go, but I think I'll stick to derby parties at people's houses from now on.   

The next day was my bridal shower!  Of all the pre-wedding parties the knot tells you to have, the shower was the only one that I absolutely wanted.     
Pictured once again: my favorite ladies:

My favorite ladies and best. friends. EVER.
I also just realized this picture is the flipped image of the one above it

The shower went off with out a hitch, my mom (thank god) didn't freak out once (pre-shower she was putting herself through the ringer worrying about the number of possible guests) and I wasn't allowed to help at all. Mike showed up the beginning of the shower to drop off his mom and he met a few people. Then he, his dad and my dad took off for a few hours to do guy things, while I drank champagne and opened presents.  The food was yummy, the cake was wonderful, and everyone had a great time.  I think my future mother in law was a bit surprised at what the names of her future grandchildren are going to be, but I was quick to tell her that it was her son who picked out Sharktopus and Dinocroc.

Eventually everyone had to get on the road or to the airport with the many many miles traveled to get to Lexington, including Mike and I.  With all the excitement of the past few days, we decided to stop in Asheville that night instead of driving into the early morning.  I wrote my thank you notes almost as soon as I got home (though, I just got them in the mailbox today), and then realized I would be married in less than 3 weeks and may have freaked out a tiny bit.

It was a wonderful weekend full of funtimes, celebration and happiness, and I enjoyed every second of it. I'm so lucky to have all these people in my life. Thank you so much ladies!

A Vote For Marriage. FOR EVERYONE

So I promise to recap the derby and bridal shower here soon enough and tell everyone that it was a perfect weekend and I'm so happy that I have friends and family who love me to and to do that for me.

But today is election day in North Carolina and there is a more pressing mater Amendment 1, which would define marriage as one man and one woman and it will be the only recognized legal union.
Vote AGAINST it.

Not just because it blatantly makes discrimination ok.
Not just because I want to see my friends Tiffany and Jill get married if only to see my friend Tiffany in a big poofy dress.
Because this constitutional ban is not designed to protect families, seniors and all women at all. It actually harms them.
And who is to define "family" in the first place?  How is a kid raised by 2 committed adults not a family?  If the goal is to have all children raised in a 2 parent household, that makes single parents not a family.  What about the guy who gets 3 women pregnant around the same time?  He can't marry all 3, so which one does he choose to define as his family? (probably the one that doesn't kick his slutty ass to the curb).
I could continue about the harms the amendment would do, but I'll let the other websites who say it better than me do so.
But laws like this make me indignant, and frankly, ashamed that they are even brought to the table in the first place.  And while my blog and soap box may be little in the grand scheme of life, it needs to be said that this is NOT OK.

Happy Derby Day!

It's the first Saturday in May. Which can only mean one thing to this born and bred Kentucky girl:
It's Derby Day!

The best part? This year, I'm going for the first time ever. Best bachelorette party ever!

Fair Game

My rsvp date was April 30th. So as of now I consider anyone who hasn't rsvped one way or another fair game to hassle.
You know who you are. And you're in my ribbon cross hairs.
Here's to hunting!